A Review of 2022

 So I started this year wondering if I should be excited or indifferent.

Everyone around me is super geared for the new year and has penned down a million and one goals...

But here I am, lost in thought, clueless about the goals to pursue, and careful not to create a bubble that might break.

Little wonder why this is.

2022 was a year that showed me premium shege. You know that feeling of the more you look, the less you see 😒 - that was precisely what I had experienced in the previous year. The year started off well with my previous company paying a part of what they had owed in 2021 and promising to pay up the rest while getting us to prepare and work on this major project. With all of the ginger, we kicked the ball rolling and started the project. It was a major one for me as this project stretched and over dragged me to discover the amazing gifts I had within.

I had the opportunity to work as the Head of Production for a short timeframe as the previous head of production resigned at a very critical time. I also took on the role of a Casting Manager - scheduling and conducting auditions for families to contest in a TV Game Show. I was also able to manage over 130 persons within a period of 3weeks without having any physical confrontations with anyone (maybe there were spiritual confrontations😅... lol ...  you never know). 

With all of these done and dusted, one would have thought that I would be well appreciated and celebrated for my work and probably gotten whisked off to the Bahamas for a break 😄 (you wish...) but sickle cell will not allow somebody's child to be great😭. The very day production ended, I had a crisis at midnight and that was the streak of a 7days long ailment (blame it on the stress). By April, I had resigned from my job as they had started owing again adding to the previous backlog and I knew I couldn't deal. Then my search for a remote job began and I started paying and taking all those classes that promise to give you jobs on Fiverr and Upwork and got nothing.

Along the way, I jammed one Yoruba demon who showed me why they are called demons. Full of himself, not considerate of others, always claiming to be busy doing nothing, and has a very chaotic set of friends. I don't know how I found myself in that space. Scratch that... I know how I found myself in that space as I was looking for love and open to something different than I was used to and boy did I find it in a measure that I could not contain. And I ran for dear life. The details of that short 3weeks of knowing him can produce a book in itself.

After getting my heart terribly beaten and battered, I ran back to the lover of my soul. The only one who knows how to love me and love me right. I mean who loves so immensely and can go to the moon and back for you except God Almighty Himself. I took the fragments of my broken heart to Him and He fixed it and put it back together in a perfect state only that by this time, I was too weak, and dealing with my health.

My health journey was another very difficult phase that I had to deal with for 2months and a little over. It was one very tough period when the only thing I really wanted was eternal rest but God wasn't having any of that. He had just started to show me what true love is and wouldn't let me slip from His mighty hands. I spent more time in fellowship and communion with God, learning to hear Him for myself and learning to trust Him more. I lost a lot of my friends. And being that I was without a job, I had to take on day-to-day jobs just to make ends meet. Somewhere along the line, God healed me completely. He sent His angels to carry out surgery on me and give me new organs (this story will come when the time is right).

By the time all this was over, I had lost so much weight that I went from a size 10/12 to a size 6. The perfect model size only that because it wasn't a conscious weight loss, I didn't look my best. Then the process of acceptance came where I had to fall in love with this size 6 black girl and love her for who she was. Music helped my healing process, and affirmations made the journey smooth. I took on singing gigs as this made me happy, planned and prepared for outreaches as this put me in an excited state, and looked forward to traveling at Christmas (a trip that never came). 

I also had to make a conscious effort to pay back my debts as loan apps almost made me lose my mind. They came in December offering me a discount (and mumu me😕) fell for their trap and believed them. I paid my full salary in the hope that they would write off the other part of the interest as they promised but they didn't do that. I am still choked with debt in 2023 when I was really looking forward to coming into the new year debt free. One thing I would advise is that you avoid loan apps cause they are really unhealthy. But if you have already gotten from them and are stuck, do the right thing and try your best to pay back no matter how little, at the pace you can go. December had no special Christmas for me as I ended up spending on paying back a part of my debts and giving back to my community. 

One of my highlights for 2022, was getting a new job which helped in raising the funds to pay off my debts, getting new organs that helped me stay healthy and be able to work and earn as well as my Music. It reminded me of my safe haven. And although 2022 was premium shege, it was a great year as I learned the essence of true friendship. I also learned that Family is everything and would be the only thing you have when nothing else works. God will never leave you no matter what. And lastly, if you must fall in love, fall in love with an angel (LOL😂).

2023 will be a great year. But for that to happen, you must let go of the experience of the past (2022) and trust God for all that your eyes can see in this new year.

Stay positive, stay hopeful and join me on this amazing ride called 2023👊.